The Bard Series - Poetry

The Bard Series didn't start out as a poetry series. It's what I've decided to turn a collection of poems dating back as far as 1989 into. They are poems about looking for a lover, but as I have grown, I have realized that what they are really about is my own search for a healthy, balanced version of myself, my search for animus, id, whatever you want to call it. Enjoy.

Bard - September 1989

Where is he hiding that I can't find him?

What kind of test is this for me?
And who is putting me through it?
Him? Some higher force?
Are they working together?!

All day and night I search
Through crowds and dreams
Waiting for the moment
When we will meet

Waiting for the moment when our eyes will smile
And the tension will ease from our bodies
Relief
Now that we've found each other

"So glad I've found you."
As we fall together so naturally
As if by instinct
"Where have you been all this time?"

How nice it will be to find the other part of me
That has been missing for so long now
Operating without it has been exhausting
There is new life to me now

Is he feeling the same frustration?
Desperation over the unfulfilled destiny?
The teasing of a parched throat?

Panicking.
Maybe due to a freak accident
our paths will never cross.
Maybe I'll be forced to muddle along
Lonely for the rest of my time here.

No!
This soul mate I'm in search of can only be suffering
As I am right now

When will we fall together and laugh
Knowing the waiting is over?

To whatever power that is
Spinning my life up there:
Could you just hear me out a minute?

Maybe we could cut a deal
Stop sending me inadequate distractions!
When can I have the real thing?

Isn't he lonely too?
Don't you think this is entirely unfair?

Think of all the happiness waiting to be let off it's lead!
Allowed to dash free!

Spreading smiles, we'd make everyone laugh and smile
Just catching a glimpse of our radiance
Sharing a moment with us
We wouldn't be greedy

Laughing with abandon
Caring not what the disbelievers of love might think
Let them frown and turn away
They're turning their backs on their own fear of joy!
So let them laugh, with us or at us
Who'd care?

We'd be together
Oh God-that joy might be too much to bare

SIGH!
What have I said!
Please don't make us wait any longer!

Have you stopped listening?
Hello?